This week on Dopey we finally land Artie Lange! And it was crazy Dopey! Artie talks about his meteoric rise to fame and fortune as a stand up comedian, TV star, and cohost on the greatest radio show of all time. He also talks about some of his worst stories of heroin, cocaine and gambling addiction. We hear all about his time on the Howard Stern Show and how his life was turned upside down with each new terrible bottom… offering up a new opportunity. Look for his new book “Wanna Bet” coming soon!!!
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Hey Dave,
Alcohol for 20 years, heroin and opiates for 8, bentos and other pills for maybe 11 or 15 or I don’t even know.
Before anything I want to say this will be long. I want to tell you that your podcast means a lot to me. I want to confess here something that I have partially told to many many people, but never the whole thing.
But before that, I wanted to tell you that I don’t like how Artie treated you. This episode really fucking killed me. I felt like he had this god complex with Stern that he really couldn’t unpack when comparing it with the other guys on the show… that he felt that they were ass kissers and he wasn’t, that Howard was this infallible entity of radio, and his aura of mastery pits his peons against one another… it rankled me. I felt he was unfair to Dave. He mistreated you. I really like your show.
I feel a connection to this show, and this is the point where I feel where I hear Chris relapsing. In the Artie episode, he says something about going back to drugs when he isn’t honest he may use again… that was a sign. I listened to this and could feel dread.
My friend, Phil, who was the father of my best friend N.’s child, and I were using dope together for a long time without telling her. I ratted him out to her family on the day of their sons birth when we shot up in the bathroom in the hospital labor ward when she was in labor. I was afraid that he would drop the newborn baby. I ousted myself too.
We were clean for a week. We tried to help N out for a while after the c section, I started using again. It wasn’t my baby.
When Phil started using again, it was way easier for me to get powder and tar through his connections. I started using (IV for 6 yrs) with him again about a month after his kid was born. EVentually,, I hooked up with my buddy’s dealers and had my own thing. Phil’s situation got dicey because of his kid.
He got clean for a week. Then we found out he was using. I was still hiding my use from my friend N. I had been to rehab and detox twice at this point. Phil’s parents wanted to send him, but he disappeared. I got a call from N that Phil was at her house and wanted to stay. I came over. He wasn’t high. He just wanted to hang out with his son. We watched Cars and the Land Before Time. Phil was cuddling with his kid, N and I had some drinks and even went into the backyard and hung out to talk. Phil put the kid to bed and slept on the couch and me and N went to sleep in her bed.
I was woken up at 4 am by banging and yelling. I could hear N yelling Phil! What the fuck? Open the door!
I came out of the bedroom and she was kicking down the bathroom door. The baby hadn’t woken up. When the door went in, I saw Phil on the floor. His skin was translucent blue and he had elastic by his arm and a needle. His kit was beside him. Of course I didn’t register those details besides the blue skin until after.
Ambulances came even though I felt his neck and wrists and leg and even thumbs and felt nothing beating. Noelle had already called 911 and taken the baby to the backyard. I backed off when the sirens came and the EMT showed up and asked us questions and I didn’t fucking know, and I just wanted a drink.
But I guess that’s my story. I can’t really tell any more right now, it’s fucking with my memory and making me mad.
But I love your podcast and even though I’m not completely sober and 12 step wasn’t for me I am not shooting heroin or using opiates, mostly drink, every once and a while snort some bentos but not much. Thanks for being real.
Catherine